Why??!

 By: Connie J..., January 15, 2026

If I had a nickel for every time someone asked me why I did something, good or bad, I would be a millionaire.


Sometimes, it was a conscious, thought-out choice; other times, it's because I had a period of a type of mental paralyzation - caused by feeling overwhelmed.


Though it has improved; it still happens, and it can take awhile for me to really catch ahold of it and name it.


I looked back on my Advent Calendar, from this previous December. The last date I put an ornament up, was December 15. I realized a couple weeks, ago, that was the date I shut down - to get through the Holiday Season in retail.


I knew I had been struggling, throughout the year; but when I noticed that calendar, it was like a flashing red light in my face!!!

I have been trying to evaluate this last year, and my downward trend, for awhile. I was functional, went to work, etc; but all the parts of my engine were not engaging.


Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner - overwhelmed, it is!!! I noticed I had lost my coping for that Holiday Rush - but I thought it was because I had lost my "Holiday Momentum", the last few years, being out with my surgeries, etc.


Whatever the reason - I have an official date of shutdown. Apparently, I just gave up the fight.


I have been trying to talk it through, with both myself AND my Counselor - not to make excuses; but to get to the root of it. That, is still a work in progress...



Have you had this happen to you? Some people refer to it as "spiraling", etc. Gotta say, honestly, am NOT a fan - but, here we are...


We would LOVE to hear any insight you might have. Please contact the ministry via this website; or email us at Ozer Ministries, Inc - ozerministries@att.net; or my email - Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com. Have a good day, and be safe!!! #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou #domesticviolenceiseverywhere #youarenotalone #doyouknow

PREVIOUS POSTS

By Connie J... August 24, 2026
...a good color to see life through. I am a second-generation (that I know of) "rageaholic". My fuse used to be so short, I sometimes wondered if there was even one to light - or that it was straight powder. As I have grown, matured and learned who I REALLY am/want to be, I have worked on that fuse. I watched my Father rage for most of my 51 years, before he passed. From conversations with people at the nursing home, I believe he had an 11th hour reckoning. While in my 20s, I had a friend take my car keys, "Because friends don't let friends drive angry." In my 30s, while in front of a judge, yet again, for speeding, he asked why? Told him I was angry. He pulled up my docket, and asked, "Were you angry this time, and this time, and this time...?". One of the MANY tickets, I was actually tired - ALL of the others were anger-related. Like I said, red is NOT a good color to see life through. I have been behaving, for many years, now; and if am angry, I find other outlets. Some of them being: - talking to someone - journaling - some type of creative venture - writing poetry - listening to/writing music - blogging (this blog is a GREAT outlet!!!) - art therapy Any number of options are available. You just have to make the choice to not be controlled by that anger. Does any of this connect with any part of your life, or someone you know? How have you fought that anger; or have you faced it, yet? Trust me, it will jot just go away. We would LOVE to hear any insight you might have. Please contact the ministry via this website; or email us at Ozer Ministries, Inc - ozerministries@att.net ; or my email - Connie J... - beamererin@yahoo.com . Have a good day, and be safe!!! #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #isityou #domesticviolenceiseverywhere #youarenotalone #doyouknow #choicesmatter #anger #red
By Connie J... August 17, 2026
I hear so many people say things, like, "When ___ happens, I'll be ready to ___.", or "If only I could ___, then I'd be ready for/to ___.", etc. They're looking/waiting for something external to cause the change. Like "The Good Witch of the East" told Dorothy and her crew; what they needed was inside them, all along. It's the choices you make EVERY day, both good AND bad, that compound and create your life. If you're not happy with how your life's going, what choices can you make, RIGHT NOW, to change your life's trajectory. To quote Erin Brockovich, "Superman is not coming."  What are YOU gonna do to bring about change??!
By Connie J... August 10, 2026
Often, when I feel that desperate urge to help someone (especially if they have NOT asked for it), I have to stop and ask myself, "Who am I doing this for??!". Having been such a people-pleaser for so long, I gotta check my motivation. Sometimes, doing something for the wrong reason, is as ineffective as not doing it, at all. I mean sure, who CAN'T use help, almost always - but I'm scoping further out - am I coming between them, and a very valuable life-lesson? Have they landed in this particular situation due to the life-choices THEY have made; and if I swoop in and help them, am I robbing them of that life-lesson??! While THAT really isn't my choice to make - my helping them, is. If I feel compelled, like in my bones - yes; but if I have a "catch" - you KNOW what that is, perhaps I need to just step back. You cannot be controlled by whether they get mad, or not - follow YOUR feeling, and do what YOU need to do. Have you ever found yourself in this kind of predicament? How did yours play out? 
By Connie J... August 3, 2026
Often, when I feel that desperate urge to help someone (especially if they have NOT asked for it), I have to stop and ask myself, "Who am I doing this for??!". Having been such a people-pleaser for so long, I gotta check my motivation. Sometimes, doing something for the wrong reason, is as ineffective as not doing it, at all. I mean sure, who CAN'T use help, almost always - but I'm scoping further out - am I coming between them, and a very valuable life-lesson? Have they landed in this particular situation due to the life-choices THEY have made; and if I swoop in and help them, am I robbing them of that life-lesson??! While THAT really isn't my choice to make - my helping them, is. If I feel compelled, like in my bones - yes; but if I have a "catch" - you KNOW what that is, perhaps I need to just step back. You cannot be controlled by whether they get mad, or not - follow YOUR feeling, and do what YOU need to do. Have you ever found yourself in this kind of predicament? How did yours play out? 
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