Apr. 14, 2020

A Hostage Situation... (Connie J...)

If you heard someone say they were being held hostage - how would you react? Would you casually tell them, "Maybe you should just leave your situation."

No, most people would be appalled that somebody would hold a person hostage!!! Our First Responders even have a whole division of "Hostage Negotiators".

So why do some ask people in Domestic Violence situations, "Why don't you just leave?" They are being held hostage by tethers usually invisible to the naked eye - manipulation, gaslighting, threats, fear - so many issues hold them there.

Many are Victims of generations of these same relationship behaviors, and aren't even aware of it!!!

I was in my late 40s, before I realized I had grown up in a Domestic Violence situation. I knew things didn't seem right; but, "What happens at home, stays at home." But this was also why, I would do almost anything to be away from my home, as much as possible.

Please keep in mind, that "just leaving", is not the easiest thing to do. In many situations, the only escape is death - usually at the hand of their partner. "If I can't have you, nobody can!!!"

Leaving is possible - though scary. Talk to someone at a Domestic Violence Shelter, make an escape plan. I knew someone that put some of their kids' toys into laundry baskets under their clothes. Made plans with a friend, while her hubby went fishing, waaaay outside of town, and pick him up, later.  (Or not.) In the meantime, another person, an "Aunt", wanted to spend time with the kids. Took them to Mom, in a safe place an hour away.

Be creative. Use the resources that are available.

Have a good day, and be safe... #ENDtheSILENCEofVIOLENCE #EtSoV