What Does Domestic Violence Mean to Me, Personally? #NOMORE (Connie J)
I was actually raised in a Domestic Violence situation, and never realized it til I had an epiphany in my 40's. My Mother is 88, and will never know she was a victim. Even now, as I write this, I realize I am still learning about my own situation. I have always referred to it as covert. It wasn't.
Everybody knew what an imbecile he could be; but people were just as supportive as they were allowed to be, gave looks of pity, and sometimes, just shook their heads. You didn't talk about it - "what happened at home, stayed at home", right??! But it wasn't just at home. He was a rage-aholic; I am a RECOVERING rage-aholic - I KNOW.
He never physically abused anyone, but he could make you feel like you were personally responsible for World Hunger. HIS way was right - EVEN IF he was dead wrong!!! He never never took responsibility for his own actions; and if you questioned ANYTHING he did, it got turned around so fast on you, you didn't know what hit you.
He would disappear for hours at a time - all my Mother had to say was, "Where were you?" - he would explode!!! He was a bully. I honestly don't know if he ever hit her; but one time, I saw him push her down in our upstairs hallway. I don't remember how old I was, but I got up in his face and told him, "You will NOT push my Mother down!!!" See, if he would have pushed her the other way, he could have pushed her down the stairs, and she probably would have gone out the landing window, and landed in the driveway.
Sorry, this should probably be in a journal, somewhere; but THIS is the kind of stuff we're fighting against. It's the every-day kind of thing that happens in households to the left of yours, or to the right...or even in your OWN home...please, join us in saying #NOMORE